This is part I in a two part series about a framework for learning nervous system regulation. I will publish part II soon and share it in my email newsletter.
I have been proactively practicing nervous system regulation in one form or another since 2013.
For the first 7 years, managing how my nervous system responded to stress was summed up in one practice—meditation. At the time, I knew nothing about the nervous system and how it worked, I just knew that I struggled with anxiety and meditation helped.
Then in 2020, a month before lock down kicked off, I started working with a therapist, Kate, who changed my life.
I had tried therapy before and grown from it, but this was different. Kate introduced me to my nervous system and the different states it could be in. According to the polyvagal theory, a framework created by Dr. Stephen Porges, there are three states:
Ventral vagal - the state in which we feel safe and social. This is considered home base.
Sympathetic - the state in which we move into fight or flight. This is my go-to state when I’m stressed, my “home” away from the home base of ventral vagal.
Dorsal vagal - the state in which we move into shutdown and collapse. My nervous system visits this state on occasion but for others, this can be their go-to, or their “home” away from the home base of ventral vagal.
Kate educated me about how each state drove my behaviors and helped me connect the dots between my nervous system, and how it danced with the nervous systems of others, from my family, to my partner, to my friends and coworkers.
Many of us never learned healthy skills for coping with stress and conflict growing up. Despite being arguably the most important foundational tool kit for navigating anything and everything in life effectively, it’s not taught or necessarily modeled in school, and for many of us it also wasn’t modeled at home, on TV, and definitely not in the news.
Since that first introduction to polyvagal theory from Kate three years ago, I have read and listened to many resources and experimented with all sorts of practices to learn about and work with my nervous system. Below are some of my favorites:
I listened to a number of podcast episodes about the nervous system from Andrew Huberman
I’m currently testing a new breathwork app, Pneuma+ and doing daily breathwork sessions
I’m currently working through the Vagus Nerve Program.
I recently took the 30-day course Path to Food Freedom, which is a nervous system based approach to healing from disordered eating, and I use the practices daily, including a 5 minute meditation I do 1-2x per day before meals.
All of these resources have helped me build a deep foundational understanding of how I can work with my nervous system to build the life, career, and relationships I want. Now it’s all about practice, practice, practice.
Stay tuned for Part II in this series on a framework for learning nervous system regulation. I will link it here once it’s published and share it on my email newsletter—subscribe here.